Hearing about other people's marriage struggles, even when your own marriage feels strong and healthy, hits some kind of painful spot.  Those couples were in love once.  They held hands.  They got excited to hear each other's voices on the phone.  They were each other's best friends. They were silly and had private jokes.  They planned to have children-were so thrilled together when they held their very own babies.  They listened to each other's work struggles.  They went out to dinner with other couples.  They bought first houses.  Put together Ikea furniture.  Struggled through sleepless nights, teething, tantrums.  And very possibly other, harder things-job losses, miscarriages, sicknesses, diagnoses, deaths of parents.  When do those things start driving a wedge?  When do the silly annoyances, "oh he's sloppy" or "she's just so negative" start adding up?  How do you go from feeling like you're a team, to feeling alone? misunderstood? not supported? cared for? To feeling like you'd rather go through the agony of tearing your family apart rather than living together in misery for another day?  Do you see it happen?  And where is the point that it's irreparable? When you just don't care to even try?  When it seems hopeless?  The older I get, the less black and white the world becomes.